What does it really mean to love yourself?

So I’m trying something new here…I went on a little Instagram Story adventure and decided to post it on YouTube so that I could upload it here for you guys. I love that Instagram stories are so spur of the moment and really connect you to people on a whole new level, but they do disappear after 24 hours so I thought in case you missed it – here’s my latest video all about self love and what it means to love yourself.

If you’re not following me on Instagram yet, please do! I’m planning to start doing Instagram stories pretty frequently to share things I’ve learned throughout the week. I’ll also post to YouTube so be sure to subscribe to my channel in case you miss my Instagram stories. And if you don’t feel like going to YouTube, I’ll also post them here. That’s the plan at least. 😉

So this video is about my recent revelation about self love and how I wasn’t really practicing it at all, even though I thought I kind of was. What does it really mean to love yourself? Find out what I think in the video!

You may or may not have noticed a little radio silence from me over the past 2 weeks. It’s been a rough period for me. Since October, I’ve been recovering well from my skin disorder and even though I’ve been having flare ups every couple of weeks, they’ve been minor and have gotten progressively shorter and less intense. But a little over a week ago I got hit with the worst flare I’ve had in over 6 months and it really got me down. Physically I was exhausted and found myself sleeping for 14+ hours many days and emotionally I was depressed and frustrated. I had to take a break even though it wasn’t what I wanted at the time.

As much as I wanted to spend time blogging, I just couldn’t. I didn’t have the energy or motivation to do it.

I felt like I was back at square one with not only my illness but with my emotional and mental state of being that I’ve been working so hard on improving. I was trying really hard to see the positive in my situation. I tried really hard to tell myself that this flare up was happening for a reason and that it was here to teach me something more. But damn, that was near impossible. Try as I did, I couldn’t bring myself to see or feel anything but pain, suffering, powerlessness, and yes, a bit of self-pity.

The reminder from my doctor that a full recovery usually takes 1-4 years and I was *only* 1 year into it was not encouraging. In 3 more years I would be 31! My fears about my illness came flooding back like they were excited to see me. Ugh.

“Will I ever be fully healed?”

“Will I ever feel normal again?”

“What if I never get my body back?”

“What if this interferes with starting a family?”

“What if this never fully goes away?”

I cried. A lot. I cried the whole way home from that doctor’s office. I was at a new low point for these last 6 months and all the feelings of powerlessness, overwhelm and self-pity that I felt when I was first getting sick reappeared as if they’d never left.

Forget Saying NO! Why You Should Say YES More

Happy Friday my loves!

Normally, I write pretty extensive posts because I like to provide you with as much value as possible. But today I’m going to keep it short and sweet.

Everyone is obsessed with saying NO more right now. It’s sort of like a trending self-love buzz word. The concept behind it is simple: say no to the things that you don’t want to do. Some people, like Jess McCallum, over at Confident Life, have even started keeping an “Absolute NO List” which I actually quite like because it really helps you figure out the things you don’t want to do in advance – so before you’re even presented with a situation where you’d have to say no or yes, you already have your answer, no going back!

But as important as saying NO might be, I think it’s just as important to for us to start saying “YES” more. And I don’t mean being the “Yes, man” who says yes to everything because he’s afraid of having regrets and not living enough. I’m talking about saying YES more to YOU. Give yourself permission to do things that you might be iffy about. Give yourself permission to spend money on yourself without feeling guilty. Give yourself permission to be selfish. Say YES more to yourself because you deserve it. 

What’s Blocking Your Happiness: Self-Confidence

Well hello, friends! Happy belated Valentines day! I hope you all were able to spend it with your loved ones (that includes yourselves!). Matt and I enjoyed a nice quiet evening with Matt’s brother and sister-in-law, as well as his dad who’s in town on work. It was really nice not having to sit in an overcrowded restaurant (you know how they always squeeze in extra tables on Valentine’s Day!?) and shout over an overpriced meal…but no matter how you spent it, I hope that you thoroughly enjoyed it!

So today I want to continue discussing the factors that limit our happiness. Last week I tackled the issue of self-awareness, which is, in my opinion, probably the most important but the least talked about factor that affects our happiness. So if you haven’t read that post yet, I highly recommend you do so! This week I want to dive into self-confidence because it’s something most women struggle with and it’s probably one of the most common factors in limiting happiness. So take a seat, kick your feet up, pour yourself a big cup of tea and let’s get into it!

self-confidence, self-worth, how to build your self-confidence, self-esteem, self-respect

Self-Confidence…What exactly does it mean?

Self-confidence, put quite simply, is “a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment,” according to the Oxford dictionary. I think there’s often confusion between self-confidence, self-esteem, and general confidence. I’ll try to clearly distinguish them. Self-esteem is more of a feeling of your own self-worth and self-respect. I almost liken it to how much you love and appreciate yourself. General confidence is when you trust in your abilities in a specific thing, like your confidence in break dancing for example (that would be a 0 for me). However, being a pretty self-confident person, I trust that if I wanted to get good at break dancing, I could – with patience, practice and a lot of falling flat on my face. Self-confidence to me is an overall good feeling about yourself and your abilities to accomplish your goals, that makes you happier and more successful.

What’s Blocking Your Happiness: Self-Awareness

Happy February, everyone! I love this month, it’s always so full of luuurvvv (sorry, love, I just like to say it weirdly sometimes). I always say that Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be a day because we should be spreading the love around every day, but I guess it is nice to make one day extra special. Just be sure to keep on lovin’ the rest of the year too, especially yourself! 😉 Ok, so self-awareness, let’s talk about it and how a lack of it will majorly block your happiness, yo (and I def don’t want that for you!).

I’ve been wanting to do a series of blog posts on what I feel are the most common factors that limit our happiness and hold us back from living our best life because if we can pinpoint what it is that’s holding us back, we can take the necessary steps to change it. What limits our happiness is different from person to person, however, there are definitely a few themes that we all seem to struggle with and I want to talk about them so we can kick those things to the curb. First up, is self-awareness.

I’m not the same person I was at this time last year. I’m truly happy about that because I’m in a much better place mentally and soulfully (is that really a word? Not sure but I’m using it anyway because I can!). But I just realized that not everyone feels the same about the new me. I don’t know if any of you guys have experienced this yet, but when you’re working on personal growth or going through a major life transformation it really changes you – to the point where some friends and family may feel like they don’t know you anymore or just don’t get the new you. They might even be scared by or jealous of the person you’ve become. I actually experienced this last week and I was totally taken by surprise – by my best friend in the world…

I Crushed a 7-Day Water Fast (and Why I’ll Do it Again)

Ok, shit’s about to get real. If you know me at all you know that I love food. I’m one of those “live to eat,” not “eat to live” type people. I freaking love food. All of it. Raw food, vegan food, paleo food, vegetarian food, seafood, sweet food, savory food, cold food, hot food. Seriously, I see food, I eat it. I don’t discriminate. So when I did my first water fast my friends literally thought I had gone insane. I truly think some of them thought I had gone off the deep end and this was my way of trying to end my life after months of agony dealing with my skin condition (read this post if you have no clue what I’m talking about). I know, funny, but not funny. I have a tendency to push the boundaries sometimes.

So, in case you were wondering, NO, I was definitely not trying to end my life. In fact, I was trying to do the opposite. I was trying to get my life back. I attempted my first water fast after about 8 months of living with a horrible skin condition that had completely destroyed what I had called my life up to that point. I was in pain all the time, I couldn’t sleep, I itched like a maniac 24/7, I was anxious, depressed, avoided friends and just being in public, cried all the time, you get the point. It wasn’t pretty and I wanted my fucking life back. I had been to so many doctors, tried so many different medicines, creams and remedies but nothing seemed to help. I was desperate. I would try anything at that point. Enter, the water fast.

5 Misconceptions About Happiness that Stress You Out

I was checking out at the grocery store yesterday and the cashier and the bagger (both maybe 18 year old boys) were having a disagreement about whether rich people or poor people are happier. The cashier thought that poor people are happier because #momoneymoproblems while the bagger thought rich people were happier because they could basically do anything they wanted and not have to work. Their conversation got me thinking about some of the misconceptions about happiness that we have and whether or not these beliefs themselves are actually causing unnecessary stress in our lives. What sorts of beliefs or standards are people trying to live up to in the pursuit of happiness?